Doug Fine: Author, Journalist, Adventurer, Goat-Herder

I get a fair number of inquiries from folks who’d like to help out at the Funky Butte Ranch, and even a subset from those who want to radically change their lifestyles to be more sustainable (either because of concern that this might be crucial for survival in the near-future, or just out of a desire to be “part of the solution”). But as you’ll see below, never before have I had an exchange with a repentant mortgage banker intent on undoing some of the damage from his industry’s role in bringing down the world economy.

The email wafted into my inbox on a winter morning so lovely and in-sync with the tune in my head that the chickens’ murmurs sounded like a cutting edge trip-hop effect on the beat four upbeat. So I was already smiling when I checked my messages. But “Fred”’s link to the goat herder stiffed for $53 grand by the collapsed Lehman Brothers firm jolted me comedically and culturally, for caprine reasons obvious to regular readers of these Dispatches.

Here’s “Fred”’s initial note (we’ve since had more exchanges), posted with his permission and some redactions, followed by my reply. And though it’s disturbing to hear a former financier speak of “fearing the Man,” (it’s like listening to a Bush Justice Department official lament hiring practices in the private sector), “Fred” comes across in our exchanges as a solid human intent on becoming “part of the solution.” So I say let’s wish him and his family the best. We’re all in this together.

On Jan 25, 2009, “Frederick Forsythe” Wrote:

Dear Mr. Fine,

I’d long planned to write you a letter after reading Farewell, My Subaru. It was an excellent read and as someone concerned about things like Peak Oil it was truly reassuring to read about a seemingly normal suburban guy starting over in the manner you did. I’m most impressed with your wit, courage, and likely your willingness to have old friends and family question your sanity.

The inspiration for me actually getting off my @ss and writing is that I was finally laid off a few days ago. I had a little General Tsao’s Tofu the night of my career’s passing and of course my fortune cookie said, “Now is the time to try something new”, and I’m highly superstitious. Then yesterday morning I was catching up on the news and I came across this article (http://bit.ly/47AU) about Lehman Brothers and the impact its bankruptcy is having on an outfit called Goats R Us, which apparently cleared brush on some of their residential property investments. Ironic perhaps that the goats did their job preventing Lehman’s investments from burning down and the company burnt to the ground anyway. The goats reminded me of you and the confluence of events has inspired me to write.

My story is pretty straightforward. I’m a 30-something married father of a toddler. I’d be very excited to muck out your corral or otherwise help around the Funky Butte Ranch for whatever period of time you’d be willing to consider having me. I realize that inviting myself into the middle of your working farm is extremely rude and presumptuous, but I did find a dated posting about internships which gave me some hope that you might be willing to consider it. There are two things about me that might make me an interesting applicant.

#1 - My former employer is a large bank, where I had worked for 8 years. I participated in the bulk of the mortgage cycle and for the last year had been near the center of the effort to cleanup the mess specifically surrounding mortgages, CDOs, and credit derivatives. I realize that me disclosing this might make you more likely to shoot me than to hire me ($0/hr would be great), but I mention it to be upfront and because I think my perspective could be useful if you wanted some insight into the Credit Crisis. My background could also be useful if you wanted to hurl verbal abuse at a banker. Or wanted to work a banker to death. Or you wanted to see a banker do real work. All kidding aside my reputation at work was the grumpy but competent skeptic and the thing that scares me to death about the Credit Crisis is not that no one saw it coming, but that the inflating credit and asset bubble was comfortable for a lot of people and no one was effective in doing anything to stop it. And in fact most people did not want it to end. I think the concept of an Inconvenient Truth is applicable and I sincerely hope not to live through a similar collapse if and when we reach a tipping point on even weightier topics like Global Warming or Peak Oil. On the other hand if you have already heard enough about the Credit Crisis and have no questions I can be quite handy with spreadsheets or personal financial planning. And I’m not a big talker anyway.

#2 - My wife grew up in India and her family still lives in Mumbai. Her father is retired and now devotes most of his time to his Cow Project, sustainable agriculture, and his community. When I first heard about the Cow Project it was simply described as relocating cows from urban areas of India to the countryside so they could live a better life. On my first trip to India I learned that this was an incredible oversimplification. When I got to Mumbai I was very sick and my eventual father-in-law immediately offers, “what if I could give you one pill, and I could guarantee it would make you better, but I wouldn’t tell you what was in it?” This was an awkward moment because I did want to make a good first impression but I couldn’t help but wonder if this 5′6″ rotund and jovial man was hazing me, so I mumbled out something like, “with that kind of introduction I’ll probably have to pass”. So he immediately starts rummaging, locates a small handout and hands it to me pronouncing, “I have funded the research to prove that my pills work, here please read”. Somehow he missed that the literature was in a South Indian dialect called Kanada and I’m an ignorant American. Anyway the punch line is that the pills were made out of cow products and the Cow Project was about making traditional breeds of Indian cattle economically viable to preserve them as they are being crowded out by the better producing Jersey and Holstein varieties. Naturally Indian cow products cannot involve killing the holy cow but combining the cow’s milk, poo, and pee to make different concoctions. Apparently the obvious marketing issues have limited the commercial success of these products but they are still working not only to give the cows a better life but figure out how to make their care economically self sustaining. (I don’t know if my father-in-law is affiliated with this group but if you want a summary or confirmation that I’m not kidding, checkout http://bit.ly/1uLa8C)

I guess #2 is more of an amusing anecdote, an expression of what interests me, and a “pay it forward” that if I do end up being able to hack it living a lifestyle closer to yours, and I am able to locate some traditional Indian cows and learn how to make cow product magic I will happily share this knowledge with you in the future. Just don’t ask what’s in the pills.

In terms of practical skills I’m very good with tools and light carpentry, I know a reasonable amount about small engines, and while I don’t have any experience with farm animals I do love being a dad and taking care of pets. We live in a Manhattan apartment where I have a small stock of freeze-dried food, a membership to the Central Park Zoo so I can take the kid to pet the goats and alpacas, and our most valuable non-financial asset is a Cooper Mini that gets 39mpg highway. I like to cycle, hike with a kid in the baby backpack, or read in the vein of Kunstler or Kingsolver. I’m a fishetarian who tries to eat locally and when I do shop I have a really ugly orange Home Depot reusable bag. I enjoyed reading about your mandolin efforts - recently I read an article about a laid off banker who bought a plane and guitar formerly played by Slash to cope (http://bit.ly/2Aslez) and decided to buy myself a $99 ukulele so I might one day play Somewhere Over the Rainbow for my daughters.

If you haven’t detected this yet I’m trying to convince you (and no doubt myself too) that I’m not your stereotypical banker. And I’m struggling with how awful myself and the rest of my former industry is supposed to feel about itself. I know plenty of bankers who also don’t fit the stereotype, but there is certainly a large subset that fits the stereotype, seems to lack a conscience, and isn’t facing this same struggle.

Please let me know if you have any thoughts. I know you do not run a home for wayward souls or a test pad for those interested in living your way of life. I guess I’m optimistic that you might find some humor in my story and be willing to give me a shot coming out to pay off some of my debt to society by tending your crops and perhaps one day treating the worlds ills with cow poo. In any case thank you for writing your book and your consideration.

Thanks and best wishes,
Frederick Forsythe
(Not his real name. It might not even be a “he.” And no, it’s not your Aunt Franny.)

On Jan 29, 2009, Doug Fine wrote:

Hi Fred and thanks so much for the fantastic note (though I’m sorry to hear about your job situation). I thought it was funny enough when I got to Goats R Us (in that “I better laugh so I don’t cry” mode), but then I laughed out loud (if I wasn’t totally tempted) by the exotic bovine meds. While I find your inquiry about the Funky Butte Ranch neither presumptuous nor rude, we aren’t bringing anyone on now, not even someone who could fascinate us by explaining how the financial world really works.

That said, I think that the sea change that has put you and your family where you are today could definitely help propel you into “part of the solution.” But it sounds from the tenor of your letter and your pre-existing interests and shopping habits that you were probably headed in that direction anyway. Plus, I think one could easily make the argument that the shift in sustainability priorities in the world economy now needed the shake-up that the mortgage industry helped precipitate. So I wouldn’t beat yourself up too much. Better to see the light late than never, and you’re still young. Maybe you can even be an influence with those “other” bankers you describe as still living in the spiritual/ecological Dark Ages.

Though I do indeed get a fair number of inquiries, the sentiment and heart in your letter stand out as terrific, and won’t soon be forgotten. Keep jamming on the ukulele, maybe use it as part of your psychic missionary work amongst former colleagues, and if you have time please stay in touch on your life’s progress.

Best,

Doug

(Note: the illustration for today’s Dispatch comes from the students a Rio Grande School in Santa Fe, as part of a thank you note they sent for a sustainability talk I gave there.)

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